Wednesday, February 03, 2010

A February Night

It's mid-evening for me...about 9:30pm. Time for quiet thoughts and quiet moments. I'm moving in the silence, slipping the last pieces of the day into their places when I can, shushing my own thoughts as I struggle against the urge to rush, rush, rush and finish, finish, finish. Not tonight. My last stop of the evening is on the other side of a white door. I linger long...I don't rush on...I pause. There, sleeping soundly, my baby. My little girl. Not so little. My big girl. For a while, I turn back the pages of my memory, carefully sifting through and preserving pictures that exist only in my heart. This moment...this moment is one of those pictures. Curled on her right side, blanket pulled up around her, a small pink bear clutched in one arm, a world of innocence. For the briefest of moments, her eyes open and I step back, sure I've woken her from her sound sleep. But I haven't. She barely glances at me, a smile playing at the corners of her lips. "I love you, mommy." Then silence as she slumbers again.

I'm reminded that my days, no matter how long and difficult, always bring me back to moments like this. And I wouldn't trade that for anything.

1 comment:

CRUSTYBEEF said...

so true..and so beautiful about your daughter..
how right you are.

I'm glad that you have long days, it means you're here on earth and not in heaven.

Thinking of you!!
E